LET’S TALK SHOES..

I love shoes, ever since I could remember I didn’t care about my outfit so much if the shoes looked the part. You know we can associate smells and songs with times in our lives or to invoke certain memories, well specific shoes do that for me.

When I was fourteen, I was totally in love with George Michael as he serenaded us all with Careless Whisper.  That summer I paraded around in a pair of Mexx yellow and green material ankle boots as given to me by my cousin Denise.  I thought I looked the business because they had a wedge heel inside, but you couldn’t tell on the outside.  Oh the empowerment of wearing a heel at fourteen, this was the life.

Then at fifteen I purchased a pair of bright red peep toe sandals in the winter! As I write this I’m reminded of a story about my Nanny Emma and her best friend Aunt Julie.  Essentially Julie was in a wheelchair and my Nan was taking her out for a walk. Julie had a pair of peep toe sandals which my Nan duly put on her feet when she was sitting in her wheelchair ready. One sandal on, second sandal to go, my Nan was rooting around through the peep toe of the sandal and Aunt Julie says ‘Em, what an earth are you doing?’ to which my Nan replies ‘trying to get your toes down’, Aunt Julie responds with ‘what f***ing toes I don’t have any!’  Much laughter was then had and the reason I include this as it just sets the tone of the family mentality, I’ve grown up around, as laughter is so important.

So back to my red peep toe sandals, it’s snowing and I’m going to the local shopping center with my friends. I want to wear my new sandals, so logic disappears and out I trot in the snow! After a short bus ride three of us are walking down the mall thinking we are the business looking for the boys from school and then I hear ‘Amanda stop right there!’ its my Mum!  Now this being nearly forty years ago I can’t remember the exact dialogue other than being ordered to my Mum’s place of work where I was made to swap my sandals for my Mum’s snow boots, no amount of protesting worked! Mortifying but it doesn’t end there..

I used to go to a Grammar School with a bottle green uniform and yes after sneaking my red peep toe sandals into my bag I had the audacity to wear them around school. After much of the day spent in said sandals and feeling pretty smug, I then bump into the Head of Girls, ‘Amanda Norey, end of lesson in my office!’ Let me tell you this was scary, we lived in mortal fear of being called into the Head of Girls office. In I go and questioned as to why I was wearing red on my feet which totally was against the dress code etc etc.  I was petrified, apologised, and didn’t even bother making up a story just told her I thought I looked good! Made it out alive with a couple of order marks and a total dressing down telling me I didn’t look good.  When I got home my Mum found it amusing that I’d chosen to learn the hard way, no sympathy there.

So fast forward to adulthood and oh how I loved heels, I wore them every day, rarely in trainers or anything remotely flat. I first started to notice my intolerance to heels at various work conferences I’d attend.  I can remember being at a Travel Counsellors conference and at pre drinks I had to kick off my heels as I was struggling with them, pretty rubbish because I shrunk about 5” and then had to look up at everyone all night.  Let alone watch my feet and panic about the dirt and germs I’d be picking up. Then Agent Achievement Awards, I was walking in, and I looked like I was drunk before dinner, my friend Katie had to hold me up until we sat down and again shoes came off. At the time of the heel fiasco, I really had no idea why I could not cope with balancing in heels.

Then the final straw came at the Globe Travel Awards, I was due on stage and the set had changed to include stairs, at this point I knew I could not cope with stairs. I had small kitten heels on, ok’ish and Travel Weekly were kind enough to provide me with an escort on and off stage cause I said I had a bad back!!

It has taken me four years to clear out my shoes and boots, I wasn’t exactly Imelda Marcos but I certainly had quite a few pairs.  The trouble was this had to include anything heavy, I had a cool pair of long brown Timberland boots as well as a pair of Cat ankle boots given to me over twenty years ago totally immaculate but far too heavy. Oh and the heels from Kurt Geiger to Ted Baker to Russell & Bromley, just thank goodness I hadn’t ever owned any Louboutin’s. Five black bin bags went to the Sally Army, it was a dark day!

Now when I order shoes, two issues; I don’t really go out shopping because I’m still too vain to get a mobility scooter, I did this once with friends and it was great to see them but boy, I didn’t like not being a normie! That said I should take a leaf from the Netflix series Wednesday and accept I can be a cool non-normie and it’s ok, accept it and move on, I will get there eventually!  Second is that when you order online you have no idea of the weight of the shoes, who knew this needed to be a thing!  My life now is sock boots, pumps and light weight flat suede long boots. Rather like my designs on a Ferrari rollator I now have my eye firmly on a pair of nearly barefoot feel trainers..